Trying to Better Myself: Entry 1

Updated: Apr 10, 2020

Times have been tough these days with Covid-19 disrupting our lives, but luckily for me, it hit right when the seasons started to change. I understand that I sound insensitive about it, but I am not trying to be, I promise. The good thing about the seasons changing is that it helps me to get out of my seasonal depression and if this hit America during the winter, I would be in a bigger funk than I usually am in the winter. Now that spring is on its way, I can look forward to a mood change for the better and that is why I am here writing this entry.


Since the weather has been changing for the better, my spirit has been lifted and I ACTUALLY feel like doing things! So, today, I have decided to try to better myself as a person. I want to work on my self esteem, knowledge, and my relationships, whether it be loved ones, or religion. I just want to be the best that I can be and I am tired of the little things holding me back, so as I am on this journey, I have also decided to document it the best that I can.




Look! I even made breakfast!


WAKING UP


I am SO annoying when it comes to waking up. I hate waking up early, if I don't have to, but I also love it because I feel so much better and my day doesn't feel so wasted.


Today, I did not wake up earlier than usual. I woke up at 8 AM and just laid there till I felt motivation to do anything and that's when it hit me. "I want to have a better life", I thought to myself, so I got up and took a shower, got ready for my day, and then changed into some workout clothes that kinda make me happy.


ROUTINE


I have been working on a morning routine for about 3 years now and sometimes I do it and sometimes I don't, but I always feel best when I actually do the routine. I feel fresh and ready to start my day!


This is the routine that I followed today:




Now, I know what you are thinking, or at least I know what I am thinking, "Wow, Mari, you only do 3 sets of 10?", now you listen here, voices of destruction, YES I am only starting with 3 sets of 10. Do you know WHYYYYY? It is because I am super lazy and if I set any more than that then I would simply not do it. Simple as that. I know myself well enough to find ways to ease myself into things that I don't want to do, so hush up and let me do my thing, because it works for me. Thank you.


PLAN DAY


Now, planning my day can be easy or difficult, usually depending on my mood. Today, was an okay day to plan, but I felt a little scatter brained, so I made a list of immediate things to do first and totally butchered my spelling.




So, I looked at my bad spelling and thought, "That doesn't look right... Oh well", and then I continued my cleaning. After I cleaned everything up on that list, I felt SO much better, most of the clutter was taken care and then I made another list for "Plan Day" and it was much smaller, but to be fair, they were longer tasks AND I was feeling scatter brained, REMEMBEEEEER?




So, as you can see, I have 3 out of 5 things crossed out and there is a perfectly reasonable explanation for that; I just haven't done the other 2 yet. Unfortunately, I have to head to work here real soon and I will not have enough time to get those finished before I go, so I will just have an update later when I actually get it done :)


********************************** UPDATE LATER *****************************************

Welp, I wasted a lot of time when I got home from work. I watched TV, cooked dinner, and ate dinner.




yuuuuummmm... But anyway, here I am now to get back on track!


JESUS TIME


What is Jesus time? Ha believe it or not, I wrote this down too, but I will just explain it here instead of showing you another picture of my strangely loopy handwriting.


Jesus Time is when I set time out of my day to spend time with Jesus and/or God in hopes to become closer to him and to strengthen my faith.


Today, I planned on reading a blog I found the other day on Pinterest, read from my Bible app, learn from one of my youth bibles, and pray the rosary, but like I had mentioned before, I have wasted a lot of time when I got home, and decided to shorten it up and pick only 1 thing to do for today.


I chose to read the blog.


This blog is called 7 Steps To Becoming a Better Catholic.





This is really really REALLY important to me. I don't know how to stress this enough. I have always been a Catholic, but I have been feeling a bit detached from my faith for a while now and when I saw this article, I knew it was for me, so that is what I wanted to take care of today.


The first step is focusing on admitting to yourself that there is a problem. The second step is making time for God. The third step is to sit in silence with God. The forth step is to love our neighbor. The fifth step is to love mass. The sixth step is to take the bad and turn it into to something with the help of God. The seventh step is to work on your sins.


OH MY GOODNESS! This blog hit me right where it needed to and I HIGHLY recommend it. I almost cried when reading it and I would LOVE to dive deeper into it. I took some notes as I read along and what not, but I am running out of time today, so I am writing it on my list of things to do for tomorrow and picking up right where I left off. This blog and even the website itself is something I am going to have to keep coming back to. I might even buy the book.


PAPERS


Sooooooo, I have a problem with clutter. A MAJOR problem and I hoard things and what not. It is not pretty, BUT I have been trying to get rid of the clutter, slowly, but it IS happening, AND I have been doing it Marie Kondo style.


I already did the clothes a few weeks ago and the books the other day. Now I am on the papers. Part of me wants to show how bad it is and part of me REALLY doesn't because I don't need unnecessary judgment, but I also want proof of what there is... Okay, how about this, I will show you the clutter, but ONLY if you keep all that judgement to yourself... Deal? Okay, here we go, behold my clutter!




AAAAAaaaaahhhhhh!!!!! I knoooooow.... It's SO BAD! Obviously it's not just paper. I have a lot of junk to get through and toss out, so today I am going through all this junk and figuring out what is going to stay and what is going to leave my household. I did get a head start yesterday and things are getting a little bit more organized.




....I think I took this picture wrong, but whatever it does the job. I am first organizing by size and from there I will organize by who's is who's, because, believe it or not, this isn't ALL my cutter, just MOSTLY (she says sheepishly). Then from there I will go through it a few times to see what can be tossed, what isn't necessary anymore, and what I can still use.


But anyways, that is my first day of trying to better myself. The outcome, I am still stressed and feel like I didn't get a lot of physical things done, but I do have more insight now, but I am going to end the post here, mostly because it is getting late and I want to make sure that I try to take care of at least some of the papers before I have to go to bed.


Wish me luck!


P.S. <3

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